


A Villainous Christmas

by DisneyFanatic2364



Series: The World in Gray [4]
Category: Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: Agnostic Character, Beauty and the Beast Elements, Boss/Employee Relationship, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, F/M, Family Dynamics, Friendship, Grinch References, Hispanic Character, Holidays, Male-Female Friendship, Older Man/Younger Woman, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Scrooges, Slow Burn, Team as Family, Tsunderes, Workplace Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:27:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28281675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisneyFanatic2364/pseuds/DisneyFanatic2364
Summary: A Christmas special for the fanfic "The Girl in Black."Flug, Dementia and 5.0.5. ask their newest colleague Lita Gris to join their annual gift exchange, even though she doesn't celebrate Christmas. But she still wants to get her friends gifts.Black Hat would rather eradicate the holiday altogether, and can't understand how Lita can entertain everyone's festive follies. Would the perfect gift change his mind?
Relationships: 5.0.5 & Dr. Flug (Villainous), Black Hat (Villainous)/Original Character(s), Black Hat (Villainous)/Original Female Character(s), Demencia & Dr. Flug (Villainous), Demencia (Villainous) & Original Female Character(s), Dr. Flug (Villainous) & Original Character(s), Dr. Flug (Villainous) & Original Female Character(s)
Series: The World in Gray [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1751923
Kudos: 10





	1. Part 1: An Ironic Celebration

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to finish this in time for Christmas, but the holidays are always a busy time for me. So this is going to be a two-parter, so that those of you who've been asking for a Christmas special will know I've been listening.
> 
> I actually came up with this while working on "The Girl in Black," but didn't put it into the story because it didn't quite fit the story progression. So this is more like a "Beauty and the Beast: Enchanted Christmas" kind of midquel. It takes place in the middle of the story, but at the same time it's sort of separate. I made it so there aren't as many spoilers to "The Girl in Black," but also made a few references to it. For those of you who've read "The Girl in Black," this takes place sometime between Chapter 39 and 40.
> 
> Happy Holidays and stay safe!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own "Villainous."

After nine months of working for Black Hat, Lita Gris thought she had seen in all. What she didn't expect to see were the halls of Black Hat Manor covered in Christmas decorations.

The walls were lined with tinsel and fairy lights. Wreaths hung above Black Hat's many portraits. The Hatbots that rolled by had holly in their hats.

As Lita entered the lab, she was met with the sight of her colleagues gathered around a pine tree. Flug wore a knitted Santa hat over his paper bag. 5.0.5.'s Santa hat had reindeer antlers, a big red plastic nose giving him a Rudolph look. Dementia's long, red-and-white-striped stocking hat jingled as she bounced around the tree, twisting a string of lights around. Lita felt underdressed in her plain black turtleneck and slacks.

"I didn't know Black Hat let you celebrate Christmas," she said.

Flug gave a so-so sign. "It's, err, sort of an ironic celebration. Black Hat only lets us put up decorations so he can have the pleasure of tearing them down on Christmas Day."

"Ah." Lita rolled her blue eyes.

Flug gestured to an open box of ornaments. "Care to help us trip the tree?"

"Sure."

She bent down and took out a red bulb that said _Baby's 1_ _st_ _Christmas_.

"We pretty much raided the stores and grabbed whatever," Dementia said, gnawing on a string of popcorn.

"You do realize that's plastic," Flug said.

She kept chewing. "Your point?"

Flug sighed. "Suppose we can do without the garland. It's all going to be destroyed in a few weeks anyway."

Lita hung her bulb on a branch. "Never really done this before."

"You never celebrated Christmas at your house?" Flug asked, hanging up a toy airplane.

"Well, my mom was raised Catholic, but kind of lost her faith when her family disowned her." Lita picked up a ceramic ornament of a bride and groom. "Besides, we had to save money on decorations. We did have one tradition of going to the movies on Christmas. You know, since they're always open."

"That's right, you're an atheist."

"I've been thinking about it." Lita examined a tiny wooden Nativity scene. "Agnostic is probably a more appropriate term. With all I've seen in this house, it'd be ridiculous to say there's no divinity of some kind. Just can't really dedicate myself to one faith."

"Same. Although, Christmas does make me nostalgic for…" Flug looked down at the ceramic penguin family singing carols in his hand. "Simpler times."

Dementia's head popped out of the tree. "I just like dressing up and getting all the presents!"

"Get out of there!" Flug raised his finger. "You know the rules! No breaking anything until Christmas!"

Dementia groaned and tumbled out of the tree. 5.0.5. held it in place to keep it from falling.

"So you exchange gifts?" Lita asked.

"Nothing fancy." Flug picked up a miniature gift box on a string. "Lest the boss should find and destroy them. He's more forgiving if it's something we've stolen."

"I see." Lita raised an eyebrow at a 2000 Disneyland bulb.

"Hey!" Dementia flung her arms around Lita's shoulders from behind. "It's Little Lita's first Christmas with us! We should totally include her in our gift exchange!"

Flug blinked. "That's…awfully considerate of you, Dementia. That you'd want to get a gift for—oh, wait."

He crossed his arms. "You're only including her so she can get _you_ a present, aren't you?"

Dementia stuck out her tongue. "It can be both."

"Well, I've never really been a Christmas person," Lita said, lifting Dementia's arms off. "Or a gift-giving person."

"Mrrp!" 5.0.5. widened his big bear eyes and pouted.

Lita sighed. "But hey, why the heck not?"

"Yippee!" Dementia clapped her hands. "I like makeup, hair dye, lethal weapons, and my measurements are thirty-seven—"

"Rub it in, why don't ya?" Lita folded her arms over her own, smaller chest. "Where are we even supposed to get these gifts? Rapunzel gets more outside time than we do."

"Tomorrow's shopping day," Flug said. "I'll ask Black Hat if you can accompany us to the mall."

"We get our Christmas shopping done _and_ cause needless property damage!" Dementia's hat jingled as she jumped up and down. "I _love_ the holidays!"

"Like I said, I've never really had to buy gifts for anybody before." Lita swept a stray hair behind her ear. "What kind of things do you usually get for each other?"

Dementia opened her mouth, but Flug held up a finger. "We all have our own gift-giving strategies. 5.0.5., for example, takes the handmade approach. With baked goods or hand—err, _paw_ -crafted items like potholders."

"Bow!" 5.0.5. pointed to Flug's hat.

"Oh, yes." Flug flicked the white pom-pom dangling from his hat. "He knitted this for me last year. Meanwhile, I have a very complex algorithm for devising the perfect gift based on every individual's interests and—"

"I just buy whatever reminds me of 'em." Dementia jerked her thumb towards the scientist. "Like last year, I got Fluggie this shirt that said _LOSER_ on it."

Flug narrowed his eyes. "Yes, that was, ahem, appreciated."

"Buh-bow!"

"Good point, 5.0.5. In the end, getting the perfect gift shouldn't be hard as long as you know what the person's like."

Lita had spent enough time with the crew to know what they were all into. Flug was into science and planes. Dementia liked anything punk goth and dangerous. 5.0.5. was a big fan of cooking, stuffed animals and video games. Lita was sure to find some things at the mall that would suit each of them.

Except there was one other person at the manor they hadn't talked about.

"What does Black Hat usually like for Christmas?" Lita asked.

Flug burst out laughing. Then quieted down once he realized she wasn't laughing along with him.

"Oh." He rubbed the back of his neck. "You're, uh, serious."

"I get him stuff every year!" Dementia said proudly. "Last year I got him a bleeding-heart-shaped locket with my picture inside!"

"How'd that go?" Lita asked.

Dementia frowned. "He threw it back in my face."

"Black Hat is," Flug said, tapping his fingers together, "not the kind of person you get gifts for. If he wants something, he takes it." He gestured to their surroundings. "And he has _everything_ , so there's not really anything you can give him that he doesn't already have."

He pointed at Lita. "Except your immortal soul, or course."

"Been there, done that." Lita waved one hand, picking up a bulb with the other. "Gotta say, it's nice seeing the place spruced up a bit. Less…dreary."

"Tell me about it." Flug handed 5.0.5. a ceramic teddy bear to hang up. "The only other time we get to decorate the manor is for Día de los Muertos."

"Now see _that_ celebration makes sense."

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!"

Everyone jumped at the sound of a rampaging rhino. Flug saluted as he turned to Black Hat, who had steam coming out from under his hat.

"S-Sir! Y-You gave us permission to r-ready the tree for your destruction, sir!"

"I meant what is the meaning of _this_?" Black Hat held up mistletoe between his fingers with a disgusted sneer. "This hideous plant was above the door to my office!"

Lita had a pretty good idea who was behind that.

"Oh, honeybun! Mistletoe!" Dementia bounced up to Black Hat so that they were both under it. "This is so unexpected, but you know tradition!"

She closed her eyes and puckered her lips. Black Hat grabbed her face, squeezed her mouth open and stuffed the mistletoe down her throat. Dementia sputtered and choked. 5.0.5. ran up to her and pulled the Heimlich maneuver. Dementia coughed up leaves and white berries.

Lita put a hand to her mouth. "Isn't mistletoe poisonous?"

"Not enough to kill her," Flug said. "Though she'll probably be nauseous for a few hours."

Black Hat scowled at the green bulb hanging from Lita's hand. "Don't tell me _you're_ caught up in this Saturnalian madness as well!"

"Satur-who-nan?" Lita cocked her head.

"Saturnalia," Flug explained. "An Ancient Roman festival celebrated in mid-December, honoring the agricultural god Saturn. The Catholic Church incorporated some of the festival's traditions into Christmas in order to convince pagans to—"

Black Hat effortlessly stuck out his arm and knocked over the Christmas tree. Flug winced at the _crash_ of delicate ornaments that followed.

"Just what I needed." Black Hat turned back to Lita. "Another yuletide crackpot celebrating the birth of that self-righteous, water-walking do-gooder!"

Lita had many questions. But didn't dare ask.

"Actually, boss," she said, "I don't celebrate Christmas. I don't have a religion, remember?"

Black Hat's shoulders relaxed as he straightened up. "Well. At least _one_ of you has sense in this house."

He glanced at Dementia who was crouched on the floor, her face green and cheeks puffed. 5.0.5. offered her a glass of eggnog. Flug got a broom and began sweeping up the shards of broken colored glass.

"I despise this time of year," Black Hat huffed. "So many _happy_ people buying overpriced pine needles and colored paper and glass garbage!"

He took the ornament from Lita's hand and threw it over his shoulder. _Smash!_ Flug sighed and moved to clean up the new mess.

Black Hat wasn't finished with his rant. "So much money squandered on useless junk that could be better spent elsewhere!"

Lita crossed her arms. "Like Black Hat products?"

"Exactly!" The boss grinned as he patted her head. "And that is why you're my favorite, Lita."

"Hey!" Dementia called from the floor.

"Sir!" Flug said.

"Oh, please, it was never a contest." Black Hat rolled his eye. "The only _good_ thing about this," he gagged, " _joyous_ occasion is the business we get from clients wanting to steal Christmas."

Lita raised an eyebrow. "Uh, hasn't that been proven, on a number of occasions, impossible?"

Black Hat showed his teeth. "Which is why so many determined fools still attempt it year after year. Which reminds me. Lita, I have several hundred orders for killer toys and I need you to fill out the invoices. My office in five."

As Black Hat stomped out of the lab, he saw a wreath on the airlock door. With a grunt, he snatched it up and ripped it apart in his jaws, his mouth foaming like a rabid dog's. He spat out the chewed-up pine needles and slammed the door. Strong enough to shake the lab and knock the tinsel off the walls.

"Well," Lita said. "He's a real Scrooge, isn't he?"

The others stared at her in confusion.

"What? Everyone knows _A Christmas Carol._ It's only been made into a movie like a billion times."

* * *

It turned out Black Hat didn't want Lita in his office to do some paperwork. More so that he wanted someone to rave on about his distaste of Christmas to.

"They spend all that money on pointless gifts and then wrap them in paper and ribbons! All their talk of recycling and saving the Earth and they kill more trees than I do! And those ridiculous toy drives are just the humans' way of making themselves appear _charitable_ , but do nothing to help the poor and needy the rest of the year! It's all hypocritical if you ask me."

Lita sat at her desk, trying to focus on paperwork. "Mmm-hmm."

"And don't get me started on the fluffy Christmas specials! All that talk of giving and anti-commercialism while making a profit on DVD sales and merchandise! Although," Black Hat said with a dark chuckle, "I do enjoy that one film where that little boy gets a gun and shoots his eye out with no repercussions."

"That's nice, boss."

Black Hat frowned. "Are you even listening?"

"Blah, blah, blah, Christmas is a hypocrisy. Blah, blah, blah, capitalism at its finest." Lita didn't look up as she placed a sheet in the done pile and moved onto the next one. "For someone who hates Christmas, you sure talk about it a lot."

He narrowed his eye. "I could set you on fire for that attitude, missy."

"Whatever. So long as you don't burn up my work."

Black Hat gave up on trying to get a rise out of her and turned his attention to his own pile of invoices.

Every now and then, he stole a glance at Lita across the room. He noted the way her bright blue eyes carefully scanned the page in front of her. How delicately her honey-colored fingers twirled her ballpoint pen in contemplation.

He watched as she went through each sheet swiftly. Black Hat hadn't been lying about Lita being his favorite. She was competent, levelheaded, witty, and never afraid to challenge him. Which was a nice change from the souls he usually collected. Not only was she a dedicated employee, but made excellent company. These long paperwork sessions were certainly less tiresome with her around.

Lita put her pen down once to take the scrunchie out of her long, black ponytail and retie it so that all the hair was out of her soft, heart-shaped face. Her bangs fell gently over her forehead, dangling just above her lovely eyes.

"By the way, boss."

Black Hat's cheeks darkened as he quickly looked back down at the blank invoice beneath his gloved hands.

Thankfully, Lita didn't seem to notice that he'd been staring. "The others were wondering if I could go shopping with them tomorrow."

He began filling out the sheet in front of him. "Between the three of them, I hardly think they require your assistance in hauling groceries."

Lita scowled at his patronizing tone. Black Hat had been keeping her on a tight leash lately. It'd been almost a month since she'd tasted fresh air. Not even for a heist. Everyone else got to run errands or go on missions. But for some reason, Black Hat wanted her to stay right where he could see her.

She took a deep breath. Shouting would not help the situation.

"I need some…personal items."

Black Hat kept his gaze downward. "What could you possibly need that the others cannot get for you?"

Lita bit her lip. "I'm getting personal items for _them_."

 _Snap!_ Ink sputtered all over Black Hat's glove as he crushed the broken pen. He raised his gaze towards Lita.

"Blast it. You're participating in their pointless little gift exchange, aren't you?"

"So what if I am?" She straightened in her seat. "I won't pay for anything, if that makes you feel better."

Black Hat tossed the plastic remains of the pen into the waste basket. "I thought you didn't _do_ Christmas."

"I don't." Lita kept her voice steady. "But I still want to get gifts for Flug, Dementia and 5.0.5."

"Whatever for?" He took out his pocket handkerchief and wiped the ink off his hand. "What do _you_ get out of it?"

"Nothing. I mean, I _suppose_ they'll give me something too, but—"

"Ah." Black Hat grinned. "Now _that_ I understand."

Seeing that the ink was only spreading, Black Hat snapped his fingers to clean up his glove and handkerchief.

"Very well." He conjured up a new pen. "Just be sure to leave a trail of chaos in your wake."

"You hired me for stealth," Lita said bluntly. "Chaos is Dementia's job."

A snort of laughter escaped Black Hat. "All the same, our organization has a reputation to maintain."

Lita picked up the next invoice. "I'll burn a Christmas tree on the way out."

He chuckled. "Good girl."

Lita watched her boss as he continued his paperwork.

There was a time when Lita and Black Hat could converse easily. To the point where he would invite her for lunch every day and ask for her opinion on everything. But things had been different ever since Lita discovered that she was hopelessly attracted to her boss.

There was nothing she could do about it. Crushes were uncontrollable. With all the time they'd been spending together, it was only natural. But given Black Hat's rules about romance, and the fact that he was her _boss_ , Lita could only carry on as if everything was normal.

But things _weren't_ normal. Not in these moments she'd find herself admiring the efficient writing speed of Black Hat's hand. It made her wonder what else those hands of his could do.

Of course, then there were times when she would be reminded of how much of a jerk he was. And that she was as crazy as Dementia to entertain such an idea.

It wasn't the hating Christmas thing. No one was required to like Christmas. What Lita didn't like was the way Black Hat had snubbed her wish to do something nice for her friends. After all, she wasn't spending the holiday at the movies with her papi this year. The organization was her life now. Time to make new memories.

* * *

"Now, remember," Flug told the others once they arrived at the mall the next day, "we meet back here in one hour." He tapped the clock on his cell. "Don't make me activate the shock feature in your tracking devices if you're late."

Lita gripped her left shoulder. "There's a shock feature?"

"Don't worry." Flug slid the phone back into his lab coat. "I only use it for emergencies."

The mall was crowded with holiday shoppers. They were so busy carrying bags and searching for the perfect gifts that they didn't even bat an eye at the four villains. Though a couple kids did stare up at the enormous blue bear in wonder.

"Ooh! Giant gingerbread house!" Dementia pointed at a candy-themed play area for small children. "Gingerbread goes great with babies!"

"No, no, no." Flug grabbed her by the collar. "You're free to vandalize, but no eating anybody. It is the holidays, after all."

Dementia pouted. "Can I at least beat up that Santa over there?"

She jerked her thumb towards a line of kids waiting to take a photo with Santa.

"Go for it." Flug folded his arms. "That jerk never gave me that Uranium-237 I wanted when I was six."

Dementia clapped her hands and slithered off into the crowd.

"You believe in Santa?" Lita asked.

Flug waved his hand. "Subjectively speaking. The concept of Santa Claus was in reality derived from the real-life Catholic Saint Nicholas of Myra and the Norse god of thunder Thor. See, the Norse had this midwinter festival dedicated to Thor as he would—"

"Flug," Lita said, holding up a hand. "As much as I'd love a lecture on theology, I'm gonna go find your gifts."

Lita waved goodbye to 5.0.5. before venturing into the crowd. It was a lot easier for her to blend in than Black Hat's other employees. Her villain outfit consisted of a gray, A-line, button-up walker coat over a black turtle-neck. Which was appropriate for the winter season. She'd switched her usual wide-brimmed, Carmen Sandiego hat for a Santa hat 5.0.5. had given her.

Lita's first stop was the toy store to check out the stuffed animals, and to see if they had any model planes. She was eyeing a shelf of Care Bears when she heard a small, excited voice cry out.

"There it is, mommy! There it is! The Bachman HO Scale Rail Chief Train Set!"

A little Hispanic girl, about seven, was tugging on her mother's coat and pointing at a large box with a picture of a train on it.

"That's what I want for Christmas, Mommy!" the girl said. "I told Santa I wanna be an engineer! Think he'll get it for me? Huh, huh?"

The mother sighed. "With the price on that train, honey, I certainly hope so."

The girl's knitted red hat had holes in it. Her puffy pink coat appeared too small for her. And her toes were peeking out of her shoes. The mother's clothes had also seen better days.

To think all that was on the little girl's mind was a toy train.

Lita felt her heart lurch as she watched the girl jump up and down and her mother put up a strained smile. Lita remembered wanting all kinds of toys when she was a child. Her parents hadn't always been able to get her what she wanted. But when they did, it had always brought joy to their less than perfect lives.

She still had the stuffed goat her mother had given to her on her tenth birthday.

Lita sighed and pulled her wallet from her backpack. _Black Hat would kill me if he knew about this._

* * *

" _¡_ _Gracias, señorita!_ " the girl said, hugging the enormous box to her tiny body.

"You didn't have to," the mother said.

"It's no problem." Lita smiled. "Every kid should get a present on Christmas."

The mother handed Lita the change for the train.

Lita waved her hand. "Keep it."

"But this is at least fifty pesos!"

"I don't need it. Get your daughter a new coat."

The mother shook her head in disbelief. "You're an angel."

Lita laughed. "Nothing of the sort. _Feliz Navidad_ _._ "

The girl and mother waved as they left. Lita went to pick up her choice of stuffed animal and model airplane. Then proceeded to walk out of the store.

The alarm went off.

"Hey!" the clerk shouted. "You didn't pay for those!"

"Bill it to Black Hat!" Lita called back.

That shut the clerk up immediately.

* * *

After lifting Dementia's gift from Hot Topic, Lita checked her phone. She had fifteen minutes to spare.

On her way back to the mall's entrance, she stopped in front of a window displaying men's formal wear. The suits and top hats reminded her of a certain dapper demon boss.

 _Should I get him something?_ Lita shook her head. _No, he'd take it as an insult._

Then again, it felt weird that she should get Flug, Dementia and 5.0.5. gifts but nothing for Black Hat. But what could Lita get him that he wouldn't throw back in her face?

She didn't want to anger him. Or let on that she saw him as more than just a boss. On the other hand, the right gift could make him a little less grumpy. And maybe, less inclined to destroy everyone else's holiday fun.

After seven minutes of debating with herself and staring at the fancy menswear, Lita stepped into the store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The challenge of this was figuring out how I was going to do a Christmas story where the main character didn't celebrate Christmas. And also I found it interesting how Black Hat had a commercial voicing his dislike of Christmas...while dressed up all festive and the manor all decorated. So yeah, I think it's more of an ironic celebration.
> 
> Stay tuned for Part 2!


	2. Gift of Evil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not getting the second half out sooner. After the busy holidays, I made a significant career change. So I've had a lot on my mind.
> 
> To avoid confusion, this story takes place in 2019, pre-COVID. Also, this chapter may contain spoilers for Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker if you haven't seen it yet.

"Dementia!" Flug cried. "Stop biting the heads off!"

Dementia pouted as she chewed, holding a decapitated gingerbread person in one hand. "But the heads are the best part!"

"They'll be even better _after_ they're decorated." Flug handed her a tube of red icing. " _Then_ you can eat them."

Dementia swallowed. "Not wrong there, nerd."

It was Christmas Eve, and the villainous gang had invited Lita to make gingerbread with them in the kitchen after dinner. 5.0.5. had given them all frilly red aprons for the occasion.

While Flug methodically outlined his gingerbread man in white icing, Lita struggled with her icing tube. Her hands hurt from squeezing so hard, and her sloppy squirts made her gingerbread people look like they'd been hit by snowballs.

"This is harder than I thought."

"It doesn't have to be a complicated design," Flug said.

Lita looked down at his gingerbread people which had perfectly symmetrical faces and outfits, intricately mapped out with icing. "Right."

Flug handed her a tub of frosting and a butter knife. "Try spreading this, and then stick the candies where you want them."

He gestured to the bowls of M&Ms and gumdrops 5.0.5. had set out. Lita shrugged and began spreading white frosting across her cookies. Dementia, meanwhile, carelessly splattered red icing all over her gingerbread people.

"Lookie, lookie! Mine are all covered in blood!"

Flug rolled his eyes while Lita laughed.

"Haven't helped with baking since my mom was alive." Once her gingerbread person was frosted, Lita picked out two blue M&Ms for the eyes. "She and Papi would do most of the baking. I'd mostly just fetch them ingredients or lick the frosting."

"Same!" Dementia said, squirting the red icing into her mouth.

Flug smirked under his bag. "This was my favorite part of Christmas when I was a kid. My brother once shoved my face in a bowl of frosting."

Dementia slowly reached for his head.

"Don't!" He held up a finger. "Get any ideas."

Dementia pouted as she chomped the head off her red-smeared gingerbread person.

"What were your parents like?" Lita asked.

Flug rarely talked about his family. When he did, it wasn't usually positive.

"Mom was nurturing. Baked wonderful gingerbread." He focused on icing his cookies. "Dad was a man of…high expectations."

Flug sighed and picked up one finished gingerbread man by the foot. "But he was never critical around Christmas. It was the one time of the year everything just felt… I don't know. Like there wasn't anything to be stressed about."

"Never really had a family to spend Christmas with." Dementia shoved the rest of her cookie into her mouth. "But hey. At least I get to do this stuff with you guys."

She punched Flug's arm. His cookie dropped onto the table and broke in half. But Flug didn't seem angry as he rubbed his arm.

Then he picked up the top half of the broken cookie and tossed it towards Dementia. She caught it between her teeth. Flug laughed as he slid the gingerbread legs beneath his bag and nibbled. 5.0.5. grunted happily as he took a fresh batch of gingerbread out of the oven and set them down to cool.

"You sure Black Hat's okay with us doing this?" Lita asked.

The others stopped laughing and shared a glance.

"You ever heard the phrase," Flug said, rubbing the back of his neck, "'better to ask forgiveness than permission?'"

Lita put down her butter knife. "You didn't ask him, did you?"

"Broo-ooh." 5.0.5. shrugged.

"Not like he was gonna say 'yes,' ya know." Dementia picked up another "bloody" cookie. "I mean my honeybun is a blast when it comes to mindless massacres. But baking holiday-themed cookies?"

She bit off the gingerbread head. "He tends to be a killjoy."

"Villains aren't supposed to like this stuff," Flug said. "Putting up Christmas decorations is one thing. But Black Hat hates us actually enjoying ourselves over jolly little activities like this."

Lita rolled her eyes. "So you like baking cookies. So what? Cookies are yummy, villain or not."

"I hear that, sister!" Dementia began chomping off the gingerbread limbs one by one.

"It's mostly the concept of us taking part in this holiday." Flug looked down at his frilly red apron. "We're not religious. We couldn't care less about good will or peace on Earth. It's just that…"

He looked over at Dementia. She stopped chewing, the body of her cookie hanging from her mouth.

"Well, it all started the year Dementia first arrived. She saw these Christmas specials on TV and asked if we could try something like that."

Dementia slurped up what was left of her gingerbread person. "We did have a tree back in the hospital. But they didn't put anything breakable on it. We didn't get to bake any cookies or pies either. Something about not wanting us near any open flames."

Flug placed a hand on her shoulder. "It wasn't easy convincing Black Hat to let me put the decorations up. Even if he tore them down afterwards, it was…pleasurable seeing how happy they made Dementia."

"The bear makes better cookies though," Dementia said, tapping the side of Flug's bag.

"Bow!" 5.0.5. clapped his paws.

It was so strange seeing them all get along. Flug and Dementia always acted like bickering siblings, with 5.0.5. often getting caught in the middle. But since the Christmas season had started, that bickering had become more like playful banter. Now the three of them were laughing and decorating cookies together. Much like Lita's family had been long ago.

Lita had never realized the holidays could have this sort of effect on people. Even those who normally couldn't stand each other. She was fortunate to bear witness to such a phenomenon.

"What in the name of all things evil is going on here?!"

And just like that, the beautiful image was shattered.

Black Hat materialized behind Lita and swiped the gingerbread person she'd been frosting out of her hand.

Flug, Dementia and 5.0.5. saluted, their hands shaking.

"S-Sir!" Flug gulped. "W-We were just…w-we finished our duties for the day! W-We didn't think y-you'd mind if—"

Lita stood up and turned to Black Hat. "Want some gingerbread?"

Flug gasped. Dementia scooped up whatever cookies she could carry and ducked under the table. 5.0.5. grabbed Lita by the shoulders and pulled her away from the demon.

Black Hat looked between his employees and the assortment of colorful cookies on the table.

"I thought I made it clear." Black Hat slowly began increasing in height. "That I didn't want you fools partaking," his voice became more demonic as he bared his sharp claws, "in this pointless, sentimental, HOLIDAY NONSENSE!"

He flipped the table over. Dementia fled from her hiding place and over to 5.0.5. and Lita. Flug quickly joined them. Everyone watched helplessly as Black Hat lifted his enlarged foot and stomped all over the gingerbread. He twisted his foot until the cookies were nothing but crumbs.

Black Hat darted his eye at Lita. "I expect this sort of frivolous folly from these idiots. But _you_ , Miss Gris. I expected better from you."

Lita opened her mouth to speak. Black Hat silenced her with a finger.

"And the next person who so much as utters a single syllable related to," he gagged, " _Christmas_ , will be spending the holiday rotting in the dungeon!"

With a swish of his coat, Black Hat slithered out of the kitchen. Tears welled up in 5.0.5.'s eyes as he looked down at the remnants of his hard work.

"Aw, don't cry, bear," Dementia said, uncharacteristically patting him on the back. "We can make more cookies. And they'll be even tastier."

"Why?" Flug grunted as he fetched a broom. "He's just going to destroy that batch too."

Dementia bit her lip. "Maybe he won't?"

"No!" Flug slammed the broom against the floor. "This happens every year! We try to have some harmless fun, and he ruins it!"

He started sweeping. "Honestly, I don't know why we even bother trying anymore."

"Because…" Dementia rocked back onto her heels. "It's fun?"

Flug sighed. "Apparently, villains aren't allowed to have fun. Unless someone gets hurt."

Dementia looked around at the messy floor. "Well. Someone got hurt, alright."

Lita watched as her friends' faces formed miserable expressions. Even Flug, whose face was always hidden, looked especially miserable with slumped shoulders and downcast eyes as he slowly swept up the mess Black Hat had made. 5.0.5. wailed as he used Dementia's ponytail for a tissue. She didn't even comment on how pathetic he looked when he cried.

"That's it." Lita stomped towards the doorway.

"Where are you going?" Flug called.

"To give that jerk a piece of my mind!"

"You sure that's a good…?"

But Lita was already gone.

"If she dies," Dementia said, "can I get her room?"

* * *

Lita didn't even think of the consequences as she threw the doors to the office open. "I've got a bone to pick with you."

Black Hat lowered the newspaper he was reading. "Just because I placed your desk in here, Miss Gris, does not mean you can barge in all willy-nilly."

Lita slammed her hands onto his desk. "What you did in the kitchen was uncalled for."

He sighed and folded up his paper. "In one of your moods, I see."

"Flug, Dem and 5.0.5. didn't deserve that. They were just making cookies."

" _Christmas_ cookies." Black Hat placed his claws on the desk as he stood. "A holiday of which I thought I had distinctly forbidden in this house."

She gestured to the wreath on his window. "You let them decorate, don't you?"

"Only so I can do _this_."

Without taking his eye off her, he reached back, stretched his arm and tugged the wreath down. His claw then burst into flames, reducing the wreath to ash.

"Villains aren't supposed to _enjoy_ this holiday." Black Hat rubbed his claws together to dispose of the ash. "Unless it is to _destroy_ it."

"Why? Where does it say a villain can't like Christmas?"

Black Hat snapped his fingers, summoning a thick book titled _Black Hat's Comprehensive Guide to Villainy_.

"Right here." He swiftly thumbed through the pages. "'Rule 1225: Villains are not to partake in the joyous occasion celebrated on December 25th, known as Christmas.'"

Lita narrowed her eyes. "And who appointed _you_ Master of the World?"

Black Hat slammed the book shut. " _I_ did. When I took over the world."

"Oh, you and your stupid rules!" She grabbed the book and threw it over her shoulder. "What happened to villains doing whatever they wanted without letting anybody stand in their way? Does it not count when it's something as simple as Christmas?"

"Careful, Miss Gris." The room grew darker as Black Hat dug his claws into the desk. "Or you'll be spending tomorrow in a cold, dark cell."

"Go ahead then. Just let the others have their fun. They're not hurting anybody."

"Exactly! I let them play nice to each other on a silly little holiday, and they'll start acting that way all year round! And for what? Disgustingly sweet cookies? A few measly wrapped gifts? To wear ridiculously colorful getup?"

"Is that so wrong?"

Black Hat huffed. "Why do _you_ even care? I thought Christmas didn't matter to you!"

"You're right. It doesn't." Lita squared her shoulders. "But it matters to Flug, Dementia and 5.0.5. In case you haven't noticed, the whole idea of Christmas gets them all excited enough that they actually get along for once. They slave away for you three hundred and sixty-five days a year, not even taking weekends off. Shouldn't they be allowed a minute, an hour, a day to be happy and enjoy themselves? Even over something as simple as exchanging gifts and baking cookies together? Show each other that despite the bickering, they really do appreciate each other?

"They do, you know. They're all each other's got." Lita looked down at her apron. "They're all _I_ got."

She met Black Hat's gaze again. "So, yes. I'm joining in their frivolous holiday activities. Not for any gifts, or anything I believe in, but because it's important to my friends. You can lock me up if you want, but that won't change how I feel about them."

Ever since she'd first arrived, if there was something Lita disagreed with, she wouldn't hesitate to make her opinion known. It infuriated Black Hat, but intrigued him at the same time. Seeing her eyes ablaze with a fiery passion. If only that was directed towards other, more important things like villainy.

Black Hat didn't like being challenged. But somehow, he could never bring himself to punish Lita for her insubordination. Not when she stood there so boldly, looking upon him without fear. It made him want to take her in his arms and…

Black Hat shook the thought out of his head. "I have told you countless times, Miss Gris. Caring for people in any fashion will get you nowhere in this line of work."

Lita sighed. "I don't know why I even bothered coming here. You never listen."

She turned to leave, but he grabbed her wrist. "We aren't finished here."

"Let go." Lita tugged on her arm.

"How many times must I remind you," Black Hat said, his voice growing dangerously low, "of who is in charge here?" His grip tightened. "Must I reprimand you for disrespecting your boss?"

Her bravery did not falter. "I don't need reminding. But how am I supposed to respect you if you won't respect me?"

Black Hat scoffed. "You think I don't—?"

"This," Lita said, pointing to the claw around her wrist, "is not respect."

He released her. She glared at him as she rubbed her wrist.

"Consider this a warning, Miss Gris." Black Hat sat back down and picked up his paper. "Next time, I won't be so merciful."

Lita's face flushed from fury. She wanted to smack him so hard in the face. But that would be futile, as he could smack her back with a greater force. It was best to leave now before he lost his temper further.

She shoved her hands into the front pocket of her apron and started for the door. Then she paused as she felt the thing she had tucked into her pocket a few minutes earlier. Her secret weapon.

She looked back at the demon reading the paper. This would either make up for her outburst, or sentence her to Christmas in the dungeon. But it was a risk she was willing to take.

Sighing, Lita walked back to the desk and placed a long, black box in front of her boss. Black Hat lowered the paper.

"What is this?"

"Just something I saw at the mall," Lita murmured as she spun back round. "Reminded me of you."

She didn't wait for his response and slammed the door behind her.

Black Hat stared at the box on his desk. It wasn't wrapped, but it was definitely a Christmas present. Every year, Dementia tried giving him something ridiculous like a love locket or matching couple sweaters. He didn't expect that sort of thing from Lita.

But why get him anything at all? She knew how he felt about this holiday. And it wasn't like there was anything he couldn't get with a snap of his fingers.

Black Hat considered destroying the box. But a part of him was curious to see what was inside. After all, it was better to know exactly what he was destroying.

Sighing, Black Hat put down his paper and picked up the box. He examined it closely. It was made from thick, black cardboard, almost twice the length of his claw. On the top, written in gold, was the name of a popular menswear store at the mall.

Seeing nothing out of the ordinary—or festive—Black Hat lifted the lid.

In the box was a pair of bright red gloves.

He stared at the gift, lowering the lid onto the desk. Tentatively, he took off his usual black gloves and picked up the new ones. He could tell from the smell and texture that they were made from genuine leather, not faux like most clothing nowadays. Which meant they were expensive. A quick look at the price tag confirmed it. Though the security tag was still attached to the left glove.

 _She actually_ stole _these_ , he thought with a smirk.

Black Hat snapped off the security tag and slid his left claw into the glove. The inside was made from soft sheepskin. He sighed contently at the warmth that met his perpetually cold skin. He then put the other glove on.

They were a perfect fit. And they matched his red dress shirt. Lita had certainly put some thought into this gift.

Black Hat frowned. _Why am I taking pleasure in this? These are but mere_ gloves _._

But they were _nice_ gloves. Gloves Lita had actually gone out of her way to steal. After he'd told her how absurd Christmas was, she'd gotten him a gift anyway. And it was a practical gift, unlike Dementia's. Lita knew what he would like.

Black Hat hadn't accepted a gift like this since he was a child.

" _Happy Saturnalia, my child."_

" _Mater! This wool blanket must've cost a fortune! However did you get it?"_

" _I would do anything to keep you warm at night, my dear boy. And one Saturnalia, you'll do the same for someone_ you _care about."_

Black Hat turned to the red skull on his desk. The empty eye sockets stared back at him.

"Oh, shut up, Mater." He crossed his arms and slumped in his chair. "No one likes a smart aleck."

* * *

Before her alarm could go off the next morning, Lita was awakened by a cackling mass of green hair leaping onto her bed.

"Wake up, sleepy head!" Dementia shook her wildly. "It's Christmas! Get up and gimme my gift!"

Lita stopped Dementia in the only way she knew how. Punching her in the face and sending her flying off the bed.

"Ha-ha!" Dementia sat up cross-legged on the floor, placing her chin on the edge of the bed. "Your left hook's getting better, kid!"

Lita rubbed her eyes. Flug and 5.0.5. came through the bedroom door, bearing colorfully wrapped gifts.

"Merry Christmas, Lita," Flug said.

Lita watched as her friends dumped their presents on the foot of her bed. "We're still doing this?" She looked up at the portrait of their boss staring down at them. "Aren't you scared Black Hat might catch us?"

"Of course." Flug glanced back nervously at the portrait. "B-But we already got the presents wrapped, so…"

Dementia leaped back onto the bed. "We can at least open 'em before Black Hat destroys 'em."

Lita blinked at the pile of gifts. "You'd risk spending Christmas in the dungeon?"

"You did, didn't you?" Flug caught Lita's raised eyebrow and rubbed the back of his neck. "We, uh, saw your speech on the security cam. No one's, err, stood up for us like that. And against Black Hat."

5.0.5. nodded with a whimper.

"I don't know how you do it without getting killed."

"Well." Lita pulled back the covers. "Let's not push our luck further and open these presents."

Luckily, Lita had kept her gifts tucked away in her underwear drawer. Not even Black Hat would dare to look in there. And the four friends began opening each other's gifts.

5.0.5. had knitted everyone matching red Christmas sweaters, each bearing the initial of their

first name in white. Flug received an article of clothing from Dementia as well. A black t-shirt with the word _NERD_ in big white letters.

"That one reminded me of you the most!" Dementia exclaimed.

Flug held up the shirt and sighed. "Well, it's better than _LOSER_ , anyway."

Dementia then ripped open her present from Flug. "Earphones?"

"For your mp3 player." Flug pointed to the side of his bag, where his ear likely was. "Please use them."

From Dementia, Lita got temporary blue hair dye, and from Flug, an encyclopedia on theology. 5.0.5. got new oven mitts from Flug, a palette of eye shadow from Dementia, and a teddy bear with reindeer antlers from Lita.

"Cool, Pennywise earrings!" Dementia held the scary clown faces up to her earlobes. "Someone hit Hot Topic."

"I know _It's_ your favorite movie," Lita said with a chuckle.

Flug gasped. "A Revell P-61 Black Widow! How did you know I wanted one of these?"

Lita shrugged. "Honestly, I just grabbed whatever kit looked cool."

"Even if Black Hat destroys all these in a few minutes," Flug said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I-I'm glad we could do this with you, Lita."

"Hey, look at that, bear." Dementia pulled down on her sweater, which reached only to her midriff. "It's just my size!"

5.0.5. grunted happily as he scooped all three of them into a big bear hug. Dementia grumbled, but made no move to escape the normally unwelcome gesture.

"Brow!"

Lita smiled and patted his paw. "Merry Christmas to you too, _Pachoncito_."

* * *

The villainous gang had just finished their breakfast of 5.0.5.'s fruitcake pancakes—which were surprisingly more delicious than they sounded—and still no sign of Black Hat. They'd even dared to wear their new sweaters down to the kitchen.

"Maybe he's planning to come down the chimney," Dementia said as she poured a carton of eggnog into her open maw. "With some killer gingerbread men like in _Krampus_."

"What's _Krampus_?" Lita asked.

Dementia spat her eggnog into Flug's face. "You've never watched _Krampus_?! It's only the best Christmas movie ever! Well, next to _Gremlins_ and _Die Hard_."

Flug grumbled as he left the kitchen to change his bag.

"Is _Die Hard_ a Christmas movie?" Lita asked.

"Course it is!" Dementia huffed. "Next you're gonna tell me you've never seen _Home Alone_ either."

"Actually—"

Dementia slammed her hands on the table and stood up. "That's it! This calls for an emergency holiday movie marathon! Anyone who's never seen _Home Alone_ has had no childhood!"

5.0.5. pointed excitedly to his plastic red nose.

"No, we're not watching that dumb deer movie! Too many happy songs and not enough mindless violence!"

5.0.5. pouted.

"I'm not so sure we'll be able to watch anything," Lita said. "We don't have the day off, remember? And after yesterday, no doubt Black Hat's got some crazy big task planned to ruin our Christmas spirit. Like—"

"Shoveling the driveway?" Dementia suggested.

"There's no snow."

"Exactly!"

"You guys aren't going to believe this." Flug came back in, holding up his phone. "Black Hat hasn't set our schedule for today."

"Huh?" Dementia and Lita said.

"Buh?" 5.0.5. tilted his head.

"I mean it. Look." He showed the screen for the Black Hat Organization app. "It's blank."

"What does that mean?" Lita asked.

5.0.5. and Dementia looked at each other and grinned.

"You get the popcorn, bear! I'll get the DVDs!"

* * *

Lita was beginning to see the reason behind Dementia's picks for holiday films.

"Had no idea Christmas movies could be so violent," Lita said during the elaborate trap sequence in _Home Alone_.

"Oh, wait till you see the second one." Dementia shoveled a heap of popcorn into her mouth. "It's _way_ more violent! And it features the most evilest of bad guys ever next to Black Hat!"

Lita raised an eyebrow as the two burglars onscreen were hit with paint cans on the stairwell. "Marv and Harry?"

Dementia shook her head. "Donald Trump!"

Lita looked at Flug, who shrugged. "He's one of our best customers."

"Ha-ha-ha!" Popcorn rained from Dementia's jaw as she laughed and pointed at the screen. "Yes! Tarantula on the face! Kevin McCallister's my spirit animal!"

 _That explains so much_ , Lita thought.

5.0.5., who feared spiders, shielded his eyes.

"It's okay, 5.0.5." Flug patted him on the back. "It's just a movie, remember?" He turned to Dementia. "Maybe we should watch _Rudolph_ after this."

"Aw!" Dementia sank into the couch. "But that's so _boring_!"

"You picked the last four movies. 5.0.5. should pick the next one."

"If this stuff upsets 5.0.5. so much," Lita said, "why didn't you say that three movies ago?"

Flug shifted his gaze. "I…happen to like _Gremlins_ and _Die Hard_ too." He looked back at the screen as Kevin cut Marv and Harry's zipline. "And this movie is a prime example of what happens when villains underestimate their opponent."

"You sure the burglars are the villains here?" Lita asked. "Kevin's family seems to be full of jerks."

"Nah, Kevin's totally the villain here!" Dementia chuckled. "I know _I'd_ love to shove a nail through an intruder's foot. No offense, Lita."

"None taken."

This wasn't the movie theater. And her parents weren't around. But Lita could see herself making this a new holiday tradition with her new family.

"Have you lot been lazing about here all day?"

Flug and 5.0.5. jumped. Dementia's hearts turned into eyes. Lita simply looked up as Black Hat moved to block the television, his claws in his pockets. He'd swapped out his usual black tie with a red scarf. His shoulders and hat were powdered with snow.

"S-Sir!" Flug saluted and stood. "W-We were just… There was nothing on the schedule s-so we thought—"

"Don't waste my time telling me what I already know, Flug." Black Hat swept the snow off his shoulders. "I was busy terrorizing children in Austria and didn't have any work for you today."

That explained the snow.

"I do, however," Black Hat said, directing his eye towards Lita, "have a special assignment for _you_ , Miss Gris."

"Me?"

"Yes. You don't celebrate Christmas, correct?" He showed his teeth. "So working today shouldn't be an issue for you."

"What?" Dementia dropped her popcorn bowl. "That's not fair! We still have to watch _Home Alone 2_!"

"It's fine, Dem. You can show me some other time." Lita patted Dementia's arm and stood. "What do you want me to do, boss?"

"Meet me at the car. I'll tell you when we get there." Black Hat looked down at her _L_ sweater. "But first, change into something less…festive."

* * *

Lita changed into her wide-brimmed hat and coat and went into the garage. Black Hat opened the door to the hearse. She expected him to take the seat across from her like usual. But this time, he scooted in beside her as he shut the door. He must've given the autopilot the location already, as it started driving as soon as the garage door was open.

_Where could we be going? Probably to meet a client. But what client would ask to meet on Christmas Day?_

Lita glanced sideways at her boss. He kept his gaze forward. She couldn't tell if he was still angry about last night, as he'd been awfully quiet the past few minutes.

Then she noticed the color of the claws in his lap.

"You're wearing the gloves."

Black Hat shoved his claws into his pockets. "They are…an acceptable gift."

Lita's face turned as red as his gloves as she smiled.

"Although," Black Hat said, clearing his throat, "I must ask. Why?"

"Well…" She pretended to look out the window at the lit-up houses. "I noticed you only have the one pair. I mean I'm sure if you _wanted_ another pair you could conjure one up. And you seem to like red almost as much as black. Don't worry I didn't pay for them, I held the clerk at gunpoint. And I know you would've liked knowing animals died to make it and—"

"I don't question your choice in gift," he said firmly. "My question is: why get me anything at all?"

"I don't know." Lita shrugged. "It just didn't feel right getting gifts for everyone else and nothing for you. Didn't want you feeling left out."

 _It's not like I'm in love with you or anything_. She hoped to whoever was in charge up there that he hadn't gotten that impression.

Lita dared to glance back, and found his gaze on her. His mouth was in a thin line.

"You're too soft for your own good, sometimes."

She frowned. "Would you rather I _didn't_ show appreciation for my boss?"

Black Hat slowly lifted his red-gloved claws into view. "Consider myself…appreciated then."

" _Destination reached_ ," the autopilot said as the hearse pulled to a stop.

Black Hat opened the door and stepped out. Lita was surprised to find that they were parked outside the Hatsville Cinema.

He held out his claw to her and she accepted it. "What are we doing here?"

"Isn't this where you normally spend this holiday?" Black Hat asked as he helped her out.

She crossed her arms. "You been watching us on the cams again?"

Black Hat shut the car door. "I make it my business to know _everything_ about my employees."

Lita saw that the hearse was parked along the curb, taking up two handicap spots. She opened her mouth but Black Hat was already headed towards the cinema.

"Hold on." She speed-walked after him. "You mean we're here to—?"

"Why else would we be at the cinema?" His eye rolled towards her. "And if you value your life, don't read too much into this."

"But…" She pointed up at the cinema's neon sign. "This…you…what—?"

"Oh, keep up! Will you?"

Impatient, Black Hat grabbed her hand and led her inside. Even though he was wearing gloves, Lita blushed at his touch.

As soon as Black Hat entered the cinema, the exceptionally long line at the box office parted like the Red Sea and flooded out the doors. The Hispanic salesgirl at the counter looked to be in high school, as she was even smaller than Lita. The poor thing shivered as Black Hat's shadow spread over her.

Black Hat released Lita's hand and placed his behind his back. "What's playing?"

"U-Uh, um…" The salesgirl gulped and consulted her register. "W-We got… _Last Christmas_? A romantic come—"

"Next."

"O-Okay, uh…" The salesgirl's finger shook as she touched the screen. "The r-remake of _Black Christmas_?"

Black Hat looked up at the TV screen with the showtimes. "Don't you have anything _not_ relating to Christmas?"

"It's a horror—"

"I don't _care_."

The salesgirl was running out of ideas. "Uh… _Frozen 2_?"

Black Hat growled.

"Yeah, that'd be a no," Lita said.

"H-How 'bout the new _Star Wars_?"

"Ooh!" Lita took Black Hat's arm. "I've actually wanted to see that."

Black Hat raised an eyebrow. "You like _Star Wars_?"

She shrugged. "Mostly I just like making fun of it."

He smirked. "Two for _Star Wars_."

"O-Okay!" The salesgirl piped as she printed out two promo tickets. She then got out a pen and clipboard. "J-Just…please. Sign this wavier not holding employees accountable for any damages inflicted upon our theater? Not that you can't do whatever you want, Lord Black Hat. We just don't wanna get fired."

Lita was impressed. "Why didn't they think of this when _I_ was working here?"

"That's right," Black Hat said as he signed the waiver like the semi-honest businessman he was. "This was one of your many failed part-time jobs, was it not?"

"Yeah. Until three hundred pesos went missing from the drawer and I got blamed for it."

Black Hat placed the clipboard on the counter. " _Were_ you responsible?"

"No." Lita sighed. "Just some newbie who forgot to ring up a few sales. But I had the record, so…"

Black Hat took the tickets from the salesgirl's shaking hand. Before they left, Lita whispered to the poor girl, "You're doing great. _Feliz Navidad_."

The girl smiled slightly. People in customer service rarely got any words of appreciation these days.

The greeter stood frozen as Black Hat approached him. The demon opted to breaking the tickets apart himself and placing the stubs in the young boy's hand. Black Hat then cut to the front of the concession line where a woman was screaming at the cashier.

"I wanted my popcorn with salt! Not _salty_!"

The teenage blonde looked like she was about to cry. "W-What's the difference?"

"Is this your first day or something?! I'd like to speak to the—"

"Hey, Karen." Lita tapped on the woman's shoulder. "You're blocking the line."

Karen turned around and shut her mouth as soon as she saw Black Hat. She scooped her popcorn bucket up in her arms and bolted. The cashier didn't appear any more comfortable.

"Go on." Black Hat pointed his cane at the menu. "Take your pick."

Lita glanced back at the line, which had grown significantly shorter since Black Hat's arrival. She didn't like cutting. It made her feel no better than that Karen. But what else was she supposed to do while accompanied by Black Hat?

So, she made her order quick so no one else would have to wait much longer. "Large popcorn, large drink and—ooh!" She picked up a box from the candy rack. "Cookie dough bites."

Black Hat held up two fingers. "Make that two large drinks."

The cashier nodded and went to scoop the popcorn. She didn't even touch her register. She hastily pushed the popcorn and empty cups towards the villains and bowed her head low. Black Hat huffed as he took one cup and headed for the soda machines. Lita gave the cashier a sympathetic look and slipped her a two hundred.

"Keep the change," Lita whispered before picking up her popcorn and drink.

Black Hat eyed her as she joined him at the soda machine. "I saw that."

"Give me a break." Lita pressed the machine for root beer. "I was in their shoes not too long ago. And she deserved it after taking that Karen's garbage."

He snorted. "You're lucky I'm feeling generous today."

When they entered their theater, some people ran out screaming. But others remained in their seats after having booked them months in advance. Not to mention all the money they'd paid.

The back row had been cleared, so Black Hat settled in the middle. Lita sat beside him. She was about to set the popcorn in the empty seat next to her when Black Hat cleared his throat and tapped on the armrest between them.

Lita placed the bucket there. "Didn't know you liked popcorn."

"Who doesn't?"

He took a single piece and popped it into his mouth. Lita could hear the faint hissing of his acid spit. Black Hat didn't usually eat in public, but it was dark enough in the theater that it didn't matter. Besides, no one had the nerve to turn around and look at him.

Lita took some popcorn herself. "Gotta say, this new trilogy's not as cheesy at the others. At least acting-wise."

Black Hat groaned. "This trilogy's villain is even whinier than the first."

"Hey." Lita pointed at the screen. "Bet you fifty pesos that Rey is related to Palpatine."

"Don't be ridiculous." He rolled his eye. "She's obviously a Kenobi. She's too _good_ at everything."

"So you want her to be all hero? No potential dark side?"

"Rather I don't want another 'I am your father' line."

"Or grandfather." Lita elbowed him. "Bet you another fifty Palpatine says that at some point."

"He's _dead_."

"His ghost then. Either way, she's totally a Palpatine. Only twist that makes sense."

Black Hat held out his claw. "You're on."

They shook on it just as the previews came to an end and the theater darkened further.

Within the first five minutes of the movie, Black Hat begrudgingly handed Lita a fifty.

Black Hat quickly proved to be one of those people who spoke loudly in the movie theater. Mainly to criticize whatever fictional villain was making a fool of himself onscreen.

"This is simply ridiculous! The Emperor finds a way to resurrect himself, and what does he do? Uses the same plan over and over. If it didn't work the first time, don't repeat that mistake!"

This didn't bother Lita. As she was one of those people too.

"Is it just me or did this Force stuff come _way_ too easy for Rey?"

Black Hat huffed. "That Kylo Ren is too much of a weakling to be a villain. I would've finished that pesky girl off in a heartbeat."

"Hey!" some idiot shouted. "We're trying to watch a movie h—"

A glare from Black Hat shut him up. All the same, Lita lowered her voice.

"Wish I had your kind of power."

Black Hat glanced sideways at her. "The lengths I went through to obtain my power, I would not recommend for a mortal such as yourself."

"Not your demon powers. I mean how you don't need to do much to get people to respect you. Or at least fear you enough not to mess with you."

"Fear and respect are not necessarily the same," Black Hat said softly. "Fear is easy to induce. Respect must be earned."

They both reached for popcorn at the same time. Her hand bumped into his claw. They turned and held gaze. Blushing, Lita pulled her hand back and waited for her boss to get his share.

Indeed, fear was easy for Black Hat to induce in others. Except for the person sitting beside him. He could smell fear, but almost never from her. After being feared for so long, it was refreshing. Which was one reason he liked having Lita around.

But there were those rare instances, like now, when he'd catch a whiff of anxiety. He wondered what she was thinking to make her smell that way.

As quickly as it had come, Lita's fear melted away as the movie went on.

* * *

Waiting for a possible after-credits scene wasn't worth spending another ten minutes in that dark theatre with the most dangerous creature alive. Lita and Black Hat were left alone before the cast list could scroll up. She handed him back the fifty.

"That kiss came out of nowhere," Black Hat said as they walked out of the theatre.

Lita tossed their trash into the bin. "Not a _Star Wars_ movie without a contrived romantic subplot."

" _That_ was the most contrived of them all! Imagine!" Black Hat snorted. "Giving up galactic conquest all for some self-righteous do-gooder who somehow manages to do everything perfectly the first time without any effort!"

Lita elbowed him. "Says the overpowered immortal demon."

"It at least took me _years_ to master _my_ powers." They stepped out of the cinema and into the cold night air. "And what is with all these perfectly powerful villains turning to the _good_ side at the last minute?"

"Maybe that good was inside them all along?"

Black Hat rolled his eye. "Maybe Emperor Palpatine should do better at manipulating people."

Lita stopped in her tracks. "Like you?"

"Exactly."

She shoved her hands into her coat pockets. "Is that why you brought me here? To manipulate me?"

Black Hat stopped and turned back to her. Her eyes were downcast with disappointment.

"Don't be ridiculous." He waved his claw. "You're far too intelligent to be manipulated."

Her cheeks reddened from both the cold and the unexpected compliment. "So why do this for me? And why give everyone else the day off? I thought you hated Christmas."

"I _do_ hate Christmas. That hasn't changed."

He stepped towards her and lifted her chin with his finger.

"I do not, however, hate _you_ ," Black Hat whispered. "Contrary to what you might think, Lita. I do…" He stopped to think of an appropriate word. " _Respect_ you."

He sounded like he'd been about to say something else.

Lita put on the biggest smile she could muster. "Aw, I _am_ your favorite!"

Black Hat retracted his claw and wagged a finger. "Don't make a bigger out of this than it already is. If anyone asks, we were out stealing Christmas presents."

Lita frowned. "Wouldn't we need presents to back that story up?"

"We burned them."

She laughed. "Now _that_ , people will believe."

Just as Black Hat opened up the hearse door, snowflakes fell lightly from the sky.

"Hey, look." Lita held out her hands to catch the flakes. "Isn't this what they call a White Christmas?"

Black Hat watched as she stuck out her tongue in a childish yet endearing manner. He'd seen snow thousands of times, but for Lita, it was a rare sight with the island's warm climate and air pollution.

The spark of wonder in her eyes never ceased to amaze him.

Black Hat told the hearse to go home and shut the door. "Let us walk."

Lita didn't object and walked alongside him, keeping her eyes on the snow. The flakes fell faster in small flurries, coating the wide brim of her gray hat in white.

"Truth be told," she said, "all I really wanted for Christmas was to have some fun with my family."

"I see." Black Hat pretended to be interested in the sidewalk cracks. "You must be devastated to be separated from your father."

"Well, sure. But I wasn't talking about Papi." She looked shyly at him. "I was talking about you."

He raised an eyebrow. "Me?"

"You, Flug, Dem, 5.0.5. You're all my family now. So I'm glad we all got to do something unrelated to villainy, for once. So…thank you. For today."

Black Hat resisted the urge to say, "You're welcome." That would indicate he had done this out of the goodness of his nonexistent heart. Truth be told, he had done this for a purely selfish reason. But he couldn't say that without Lita asking what it was.

He'd been touched by her gift. But there was one thing he wanted that he could not obtain with his powers. But it was a line he could not cross. For professional and, ironically, moral reasons.

As they continued their walk through the snow, Lita began to shiver. Black Hat watched as she hugged herself and rubbed her arms. He had gotten used to the cold a long time ago. But Lita was mortal.

"Here." He took off his scarf and wrapped it around her neck.

Lita's cheeks grew redder than the scarf. "Thanks."

Then he made another daring move. He took her hand in his claw. Lita was surprised both by the action and how warm his claw felt. Perhaps it was the new gloves, or the fact that she was wearing a pair of her own.

He said nothing else on the way home. But no words were necessary. She understood that this was his way of showing his respect.

Still, hand-holding was an awfully intimate way to go about it.

* * *

When they arrived back at the mansion, Lita took off the scarf and handed it back to Black Hat.

"Keep it," he said. "It's really more for decoration than necessity."

She was too stunned to even say thanks.

A basket of gingerbread cookies sat outside Lita's room. 5.0.5. must've made another batch while they were away.

"You're not gonna destroy these too, are you?" Lita asked her boss.

He held up a claw. "Not tonight. Tomorrow, however, will be a different matter."

"Guess I'll have to eat them really fast then."

As she opened the door, something above caught her eye.

"What's the matter?" Black Hat asked.

Lita pointed upward. Mistletoe hung from the doorway.

"Blasted Dementia!" Black Hat growled. "I tear one down, and three more spring up in its…"

He trailed off as he looked down at Lita. She was staring up at him, her eyes flitting between him and the mistletoe. Black Hat glanced back at the accursed plant, remembering the tradition that came with it. He'd scoffed at it.

But Dementia wasn't the one under it this time. It was Lita.

He looked back at her. She hadn't said anything. Just stood there, staring.

If Black Hat believed in Christmas wishes, it would be for Lita to never stop looking at him with those gentle, fearless eyes of hers. In a way no one had ever looked at him since his mother.

His attention then fell on her lips. He'd considered it before. He'd almost gone through with it, but had stopped at the last minute, out of fear that she wouldn't like it.

Now they were both under the mistletoe. Neither of them moving closer or further away. Was this a sign that he should take the chance?

To test the waters, Black Hat took Lita's hand. Her cheeks flushed, but she did not resist. He leaned forward. She stiffened.

Black Hat stopped. He had just told Lita that he respected her. For him, her employer, to kiss her, would throw that respect out the window. Her trust was something he valued. He could not break that.

Just because he was a villain didn't mean he was indecent.

Lita thought for sure Black Hat was going to kiss her. Then he took a step back, bent down, raised her hand to his lips, and kissed her knuckles like a true gentleman.

" _Feliz Navidad, Señorita Gris_ ," he whispered.

She took her hand back and picked up the basket of gingerbread. "You too, boss."

Lita went into her room and shut the door. Black Hat placed his claws behind his back and headed down the hall.

A big, blue bear head peered around the corner, smiling gleefully. 5.0.5. had been so hoping the mistletoe would give those two the push they needed. They weren't ready to admit their feelings yet, but at least Black Hat had shown some affection for Lita. Even if it was just a kiss on the hand.

"Bow!" 5.0.5. said. Which translated to: "One day."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recently left my job at the movie theater, so this chapter made me feel nostalgic for those pre-COVID days. As well as some of the things I won't miss about that job. At least it gave me something to write about.
> 
> Thing about most Christmas specials featuring a Christmas-hating character, it always ends in them converting to celebrating Christmas. But I think sometimes we need to be reminded that not everybody has to celebrate Christmas. What we should encourage is respecting people's traditions and beliefs and not prevent them from partaking in them. So that was what I was trying to convey with this Christmas special. That people with differing opinions can find common ground. That's what I love about the holiday season. Christians and non-Christians alike getting into the spirit of giving. It at least gave me a glimmer of hope this year, and frankly, the Christmas spirit hasn't left me yet, almost a month later. Even if I'm a little more agnostic in belief these days, my appreciation for Christmas will never die.
> 
> So, Happy Holidays everyone.


End file.
